Today is day 6 of the cruise. My first show was two nights ago on day 4, which was the same day we visited the Dominican Republic (which was very nice). Normally on a cruise we are asked to perform on two separate nights and there are usually two shows on each night one around 7.15 pm and one around 9.15 pm. This cruise is a little different as there are only three guest entertainers onboard (There are also in house cast shows, so the theatre is never dark) and so they have tried to stretch us all out a little. So as I said before my first show was 2 nights ago and I only did a 9.15 show. But what a show it was!
For some unexplained reason the juggling / unicycle shows always seem to happen when the ship is in the roughest seas possible and once again nature did not let us down. My tech rehearsal was at 4.30 pm and at that point the seas were fairly calm. Lights checked, sound cues arranged, quick warm up of the harder tricks and we are ready to go. By 7 pm the ship is starting to roll and the sickbags are posted on the stairways! 8 pm Jo the production manager (who only got on at 11 am this morning) calls me to ask if I am feeling seasick "No, I'm fine!" say I, "I am!" says she (Poor woman, what a start).
Poppy tells me she is worried I am going to fall off my unicycle. "Not half as worried as I am!" I reply.
Introduction done, my lead on music starts and I enter stage right. the house is full (that's 1042 people, I just checked). With seas this rough I know I have nothing to lose and fortunately the crowd are laughing with me from my first joke. The balls, bells and cigar boxes routines goes off without a hitch (although there is a bit of water on the stage following my wine glass catch).
Now I am not saying that cruise ship passengers are old but!
I have to find 10 people strong enough to hold me on the rope, this is not going to be easy and then I spy Max and Dmytro who are Ukrainian hand balancers and are on cast sitting in row 3, perfect the show is saved, to be honest I think the two of them could have done it on their own, these two have got muscles on their muscles! I was tempted to make them take off their shirts, but I didn't do that to them, because that would have been mean. I do the trick (always a winner) thank the volunteers particularly Max and Dmytro and after a quick knife juggling routine we come to the unicycle part of the show. Now by this point in the show I have already had thirteen volunteers on stage so I really have to get on the unicycle myself, I use a stepladder! (What did you think?) Which I knock over as if by mistake.
Now normally when you see a performer doing a comedy unicycle routine they are faking how hard it is to stay balanced, in these seas however I can assure you I did not need to fake anything. I cycle round the stage a couple of times and arrive next to the WOW / MOM prop case which I intend to pick up with my fishing line. A wave sends me stage left and then another to the right, this is not going to be easy and I can feel the sweat dripping down my back where I am a little nervous. The line goes down and out comes the fish "Oh my Cod!" I start in with the fish puns, the crowd are laughing. I am being pushed by the sea the whole time left, right, forwards, backwards. I'm amazed I am still upright but somehow I am. The line goes down again and this time nearly wraps itself against the unicycle chains, fortunately it doesn't get caught up and I hook the case handle, phew! The rest of the routine should take less than 5 minutes but it feels like forever. I do all my gags, the dirty unicorn getting the biggest laugh, and finally I juggle the axe, the plunger and the chicken, I jump down to thunderous applause. Alexis the cruise director gives me the outro and people are standing, success, I bow and exit stage left. I am dripping with sweat but also smiling. Alexis is congratulating me on a great show and Poppy appears looking very, very relieved. And that was that.
The next day we arrive in Tortola biggest of the British Virgin Islands which is truly beautiful, we spent a lovely day snorkeling and lying around in the sun.
My next show is scheduled for Sunday, which is Superbowl Sunday so I am guessing it will only be the Europeans and the Canadians. Whoever is there it will all be fun!
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